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Re:parent trouble
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Date: 2007/07/19 20:11
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By: HeyBoy
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Status:
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Reading these replies, I realize i'm pretty lucky. My mom recently approached me about it and I ended up coming clean to her (finally!); I had always been scared to tell her because of my perception of her negative opinion of gay people, that turned out to be purely ignorance, not having known a gay man in real life. I was so happy that she was accepting of it; she said that while she doesn't completely understand it and can't relate to it, she understands that I am gay, and that I am her son regardless, and she loves me gay or straight. My dad on the other hand, denied it, saying that is was just a phase and that I am confused about it; he likened my homosexuality to a changing personality. I took offense to it! Being gay is the one constant in my life, it's the one thing that I'm sure about, and for him to say that it's just a phase...I was really upset to say the least. We still haven't really cleared it up and discussed that fact that yes, I am gay, and I'm not going to be changing.
My advice to anyone thinking of telling their parents, is simply, to prepare yourself for the worst. I would suggest not telling your mom or dad first; I told most of my CLOSE friends before my parents, so I would be able to build up my confidence and assuredness in myself, and have a stable friend network to fall back on if things at home did happen to go badly.
It's a difficult thing, coming clean to the people who thought they'd known you for years, but when it's over, there's a sense of relief and self realization that is immeasurable. Regardless of whether or not your parents understand, accept, or even acknowledge (in my case) your homosexuality at first, or ever, to be true to yourself and stop living a falsity is on of the best gifts you can give yourself. Good luck, be safe about telling too! If you have a bad feeling about telling a parent or anyone in particular, bring a support member or just wait!
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