thanx yeah i was in such a crazy mindset when I wrote that it's been over a month since I came out to my friends and yeah I'm totally excepting of myself and coming out and (I even came out to my parents) it was tough for them but there getting over it. but I've been going to alot of gay youth meetings in and around my area and I've made great friends and I feel they've helped me except my coming out tremendously. I didn't know coming out was gonna be the same for me as it was for my parents and it all makes sense now and I'm alot happier now that I can be myself and not have to hide my actions all the time so i know that this is right for me. so yeha thanx for the advice
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Re:The Stages of Denial
Date: 2007/08/06 23:10
By: MoonRiver
Status:
Okay so I'm out to my parents and my superclose friends and just some random people. I look at coming out as Four stages: The shoebox-your still denying it yourself, The Closet: You know but no one else does, The House: You've come out to your family and a few friends, and then theres the Community: you don't care who knows. I'm still sitting around the house... I need to know how to come out to good friends that are strict mormons and catholics and crazy christian without them trying to mount your head on a wooden spike or guilt you until the cows come home. I don't think that they'd do that, but you never know. The most ironic part of it is that i live in the Lacey/Olympia area, Washington... one of the most liberal cities on the country. This next year i'm going to run for president of my High Schools GSA. The thing is that when your president you take a lot of the heat. Even though i live in a pretty liberal are there are still idiots out there. The GSA is something that is really important to me and I'd never give it up... but some of my friends... i'm usually so sure of myself so this is a real dilemma if i'm doubting myself...Help? Please?
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Re:The Stages of Denial
Date: 2007/09/03 10:53
By: pumpkinboy
Status:
My parents have been in stages 1, 2, 3 and 4 simultaneously since last October when I told them.
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Re:The Stages of Denial
Date: 2008/01/22 12:42
By: Werewolf505
Status:
I told my parents I was bi, and to this day I'm still not actually sure what I am but never mind that, that is another story.
They still have not come even close to the acceptance stage..they still claim I am too young to make a decision like that, and that it's not right for me...which to be honest hasn't helped at all in my trying to cope with it. I wanted to be honest with them, tell them what was going on in my life, but still they reject it, and we have had many fights over the topic, one resulting in me being hit in the face (supposedly not on purpose), so I just thought 'screw you guys' and left the house, spending the remainder of the evening at a friends house. Anyway... My point is, yes, everyone who comes out will have a different story to tell. And to those who are accepted fairly quickly, don't underestimate how lucky you are to have such understanding parents who are not prejudice and stubborn. I'm not saying I have bad parents, I'm saying there are many people out there who are ridiculed by their parents and shunned because of their sexuality.
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Re:The Stages of Denial
Date: 2008/01/24 09:37
By: Silverythoughts
Status:
i've told my parents and sister. my sis and surprisingly my dad were both accpeting but my mum wasn't. she went straight into denial and then tried to turn me striaght again by suggestion and saying that i should get a gf and stuff -_- i just keep being blunt though. i've talked to her about it but unluckily we are both very stubborn.
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Re:The Stages of Denial
Date: 2008/04/15 17:34
By: Spazztic waffle
Status:
rikka65 wrote: Wow, that is cheerful!
I would say that things never follow patterns except in maths questions.
This, of course, does not apply to siblings. My sister was amazing about it when I told her. My mother has been dropping strong hints that she knows and keeps trying to drag it out of me, so naturally I hide deeper. My father would go apoplectic if he ever suspected.
Families are difficult to predict at the best of times, but what you have portrayed seems to me to be a worst-case scenario. Face it, I couldn't bear to live with my parents during the first few stages!
My father would explode, he's really homophobic. This does sound like a worst-case, but a guy I know who is MtF was kicked out of his house for a while..My thoughts is that my generation will probably be just as bad parents to their kids, if not worse.
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