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Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/10 02:36
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By: xxbigboixx
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Right, well I don't really know if any of you have had this, but yeah... I really like this girl. And I mean, more than like- I'm only 16, and some people would say that that means I don't know what real love is, but to me, this is love. This is a cliche, but I honestly think about her all the time, she's perfect and beautiful, and all those things, but the only thing is, I think I might be gay. I've only ever wanked over boys, like, ever, and just, yeah :// People say that its just a phase, I'll get through it, and in time things will become clear, but after 3 years of my liking for this girl, and my constant thinking I'm gay, or in the least bi, I just dunno what to do I guess.
And I mean it's not just wanking over boys; I have imagined what my life would be like if I was married to a guy, all that sort of stuff. I find men much more attractive than girls. Tbh, I would say I was gay, if it weren't for this girl.
Also, I can't ever imagine myself feeling comfortable with having sex with a girl.
Urgghhh, I'm so confused xD
Maybe I'm bi or something, but in all honesty, I'd rather be one way or the other. Is it wrong to want that?
Anywho, a little advice would be sooooooo appreciated 
I guess it's all down to me in the end though, isn't it ://
I'm rambling, sorry XDD But yeah, I'd be really thankful for any advice!
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/11 05:37
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By: Trebo
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Yo man 
I had something similar to this, only really ever finding guys attractive, but I connected with this girl. We got really close, I wanted to be around her all the time and we both said we loved eachother, and decided to make a go of a relationship. The trouble was while I was with her, all I could really think about was other guys. We were like best mates before, but even that started to fade as she wanted something alot more intense than me. Our relationship grew worse and worse until I ended up telling her I was gay. The truth is I don't think I ever loved her in the way she loved me, I just knew she was an amazing person, real special to me, and I guess I wanted to love her so much that I confused my feelings. Since we broke up, we are even closer, she is like the best person in my life, and we have a very special relationship.
I dunno if what's going on with you is the same or not. But if you did get with her and all you could think about was other boys, maybe it would fuck things up.
This kind of thing is well confusing, I'm still not sure if I like girls or not, but I just go with what I like, rather than trying year after year to fit myself into a gay straight or bi category.
Hope everything works out alright man 
PEACE.
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/11 15:42
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By: RossWood
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Aw I have this with one of my best friends who is female. I doubt that you're bi, I just think shes a really really close friend to you
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/14 00:30
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By: xxbigboixx
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Hey
Thanks so much for your reply- it has helped more than you know!
I'm sorry that you broke up with your girlfriend, but on the other hand, proper happy that you have that relationship with her now!
I guess that sort of special bond is what I want with this girl, really.
You're totally right- if I did get with her, and think about boys, then, well, it just wouldn't be right. And that's one of the main thoughts I've been having, actually, so I'm really grateful that you mentioned it :]
I've taken your advice about not categorizing myself! After I read your reply, I'm just going with the flow, and not thinking too much about whether I'm gay or bi or whatever!
Thanks again, you've helped no end :]
And thanks RossWood- I think you're right, actually.
Its just so confusing, and me emotions are all over the place!
Thanks for the reply :]
xxx
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/14 09:28
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By: Trebo
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Glad it made sense to you man.
*sings* every little thing, is gonna be alright.
x
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/14 10:06
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By: meisinscotland
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xxbigboixx wrote:
Right, well I don't really know if any of you have had this, but yeah... I really like this girl. And I mean, more than like- I'm only 16, and some people would say that that means I don't know what real love is, but to me, this is love. This is a cliche, but I honestly think about her all the time, she's perfect and beautiful, and all those things, but the only thing is, I think I might be gay. I've only ever wanked over boys, like, ever, and just, yeah :// People say that its just a phase, I'll get through it, and in time things will become clear, but after 3 years of my liking for this girl, and my constant thinking I'm gay, or in the least bi, I just dunno what to do I guess.
And I mean it's not just wanking over boys; I have imagined what my life would be like if I was married to a guy, all that sort of stuff. I find men much more attractive than girls. Tbh, I would say I was gay, if it weren't for this girl.
Also, I can't ever imagine myself feeling comfortable with having sex with a girl.
Urgghhh, I'm so confused xD
Maybe I'm bi or something, but in all honesty, I'd rather be one way or the other. Is it wrong to want that?
Anywho, a little advice would be sooooooo appreciated
I guess it's all down to me in the end though, isn't it ://
I'm rambling, sorry XDD But yeah, I'd be really thankful for any advice!
You're not alone, I've felt it too.
And love is love, no matter what age, or who with. And only those who say it's a phase, or shun it, obviously didn't fall in love till a later age. Because trust me, love can happen at ANY age.
I have very deep love for my friends. Some people would probably find it odd, but whatever. It's like that of the love I hold for my boyfriend, but obviously without the physical part, and not as strong. This sounds like your situation. I think you're in love with her like I am in love with my closest friends, but not in love with her in the sense of boy and girlfriend love. it is confusing, but once you get to grips with it, you'll begin to like it. I am a very luvvy duvvy person towards my friends and family and I am so happy to be that way. So are they!
I hope this helped.
EDIT: Made a right cockup of the post first time round.
Post edited by: meisinscotland, at: 2008/05/14 10:11
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Re:Totally confused... any advice? :))
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Date: 2008/05/17 04:32
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By: xxbigboixx
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Thanks very much for your reply!
You've really made me think about my feelings, and I'm looking at the situation in a completely different light now!
I'm not getting too hung up everything, but rather just going with the flow.
Hopefully this summer will bring a lot of experiences, in which I can sort things out!
Again, thank you very much for the reply (:
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