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Re:coming out stories
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Date: 2006/08/18 03:01
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By: dragonking
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Status:
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Hehehe mine i did as an essay for english in yr12  I got an A for it
You hear lots of stories of people coming out of the closet, some more interesting then others. Though mine is one of the more dull ones it taught me a valuable lesson. For a while now all my friends had started to place an increasing amount of pressure on me to find a girl friend. Little did they know or suspect I had no intentions of going out with anyone from the opposite sex. I had no interest in the female sex. I had friends trying to set me up with people, people who I knew and people who I didn’t know. Though every time this happened I managed to weasel my way out with out revealing my most well kept secret. After a while I got to the point where keeping the secret was becoming more of a challenge everyday and so I decided it was time to come clean.
I wasn’t too sure on how to go about it though. Like should I come straight out, or shall I just tell a couple of people at a time, or could I tell someone and wait for them to tell everyone else so I could avoid the discomfort of telling every individual person myself. After coming to a final decision on the topic I waited for the perfect opportunity to bear my deepest secret. I decided it would be best to take it slow so first of all I would tell my best friend and only my best friend. After three unsuccessful tried I finally worked up the courage to tell him.
It was on a Friday afternoon one period before I had English my last class for the day. I was sitting in the music room and my Matthew was testing me on my knowledge of intervals. He was sitting in front of the small, badly tuned up right piano with a large smirk on his face knowing that he has found a way to get me to give a wrong answer. I was sitting at the table next to the piano diverting my eyes as so I would be unable to cheat and this already unfair contest. Badly distracted by me working out the best way to tell my best friend that I was gay severely diverted my attention away from working out the right answer. I sat for about twenty minutes playing along with his little game working up my courage. Finally I gathered up every last bit of courage I could scrounge. I could hear the words I was about to mutter in my head, goose bumps started to poke their head up from head to toe I after about ten seconds I was complete covered in them. A small sweat broke out. It got more uncontrollable as the moments leading up to the inevitable drew ever closer. My mouth dried up like a puddle in the Sahara desert. I couldn’t string two words together and then I froze. I completely froze in terror. I sat there in my paralyzed state for what would have been about five seconds however from my point of view it was like an eternity. Then through the small breaths I managed to catch I muttered “Hey man, I’m coming out of the closet… I am gay.”
Matt burst out into an uncontrolled laughter, dismissing the one action that scared me more then anything I had every seen or experienced in my whole life. Feeling open and vulnerable I tried telling him I was and it wasn’t a joke, but he kept dismissing everything I said. After that I gave up on trying to tell for the time being, he managed to get a hold of his laughter and bring it to a halt, then he span back around on the chair he was sitting on in order to continue his testing. The following Monday, I talked to Matthew again about the fact I was gay. This time I got the message through. Though it was odd I felt no fear, no discomfort and most of all no vulnerability. Slowly I told more people but only friends and close ones at that. Family and other people where still out of the question. I had neither the confidence nor self-esteem to tell them. However, I knew that one day I would have to confront them. Though by that time I had told more people and realized it got easier with each person I told. My confidence grew the one fear I held in the ordeal that I would be ridiculed and hated for my ways started to disappear as people only showed acceptance. The world I had seen in Books and T.V. shows where gays where hated and beaten had not existed here. Society was changing before my eyes and I had not noticed. This new view on the world boosted my confidence and allowed me to open the doors of my prisons with pride and ease. Since then I have told everyone close to me friends and family and have been giving nothing but total acceptance.
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