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Monday, 26 September 2005 |
My best friend (let`s just call her Isabella) and I have been best friends since the start of middle school. Isabella knows I`m bi, and she`s VERY okay with it. However, she has a very drool-worthy, but very homophobic guy friend. A guy I thought I could trust spilled my little secret to him, and now the homophobe picks on me even more than he did before! Isabella`s known this homophobe longer than she`s known me, but she says I`m a better friend. She`s gotten on his arss about him picking on me more than once, and she`s really getting fed up with him, but she just won`t ditch him. When he walks up to her while I`m talking to her, I just glare at him and leave. I`m starting to think that she wants to ditch me for him...what do I do?
Jackie!
Dear Jackie,
Get a grip you lesbo. I'm a homophobe myself. As an 84 year old, I am very connected with youth culture. You will often find me lap dancing 'go-get-it' yuppies on the banks of the Thames. This gives me wisdom, and the answer to your question:
Give them both a lap dance.
All the best,
Daisy
PS. My rates are $50/£100 an hour. Buy two and get whip lash for free.
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