dont know what i should do...

I'm fifteen and my teenage years have really started to take off. This means that I would really like to date someone and be proud about. My mom passed away a couple of years ago, so I live with my dad and my stepmom. Now of course, my stepmom probably could care less if I was gay or not, but I'm afraid of telling my dad. For one thing, he is a narrow minded, homo-hater and he seems disguisted by the very idea. I remember once, my dad and stepmom were talking and she told my dad that she thought I was gay and he kept not accepting it. That was when I was fourteen or so, and I think I should have came out right then. But I'm afraid. What would my dad do? How would they react towards me? And what about the rest of my family. (my aunts, uncle, cousins, grandparents etc.) I've always been close to my nonimmediate family and I'm scared of what they might say or think, and I know for a fact that they'll think differently of me for the rest of their lives if they knew the truth. The only one I've considered telling was my cousin Elyse who is my age and I'm VERY close to her and I know she wouldn't think too differently of me. And sometimes maybe I think I could tell my grandma (my mom's mom) but I don't know how she'd take it. I'm so afraid to come out but I know I can't hide it for the rest of my life - that's just too much hassle, and it makes me mad whenever people assume that I'm gay and always have to ask me. If I just finally come out I can stop lying and just nod my head when people ask me if I'm gay or call me gay. I also know I'd be abused at school by some people, and loved by others, for coming out. I just don't know what to do. My life is always full of challenges, but this is the biggest one I have ever had I believe. If any of you have any information or advice to give me on my predictament, please tell me! I need all the help I can get...

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